Behold! The latest in Big Brother, Inc. developments!
And yes, being a male with a girlfriend of 3 years, I really want to get “His” Email Password. I’ll catch him talking to all those cute girls while I cry and eat Ben & Jerry’s while I watch Golden Girls.
The last part really cracks me up though:
“Make sure your son, daughter…”
This is understandable, you know, watching over your kids. Makes sense, I’ve seen To Catch A Predator
But then we get this:
“…husband or wife are safe online”
Wow, really? I’m really worried that my wife or husband (They can determine that I like Mercedes-Benz from a small bit in my about me section, but they can’t read my Sexual Orientation or Relationship Status?) will be getting into some unsafe situations on the internets. Perhaps they’ve seen chats like this (which happen quite frequently in the Internets):
Overall, the best remedy for suspicion of your spouse? Duh! STALK THE B*TCH SILLY! Start sifting through the trash, check phone records, e-mails, you know, all that creepy paranoid fun stuff! Yay!
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